Dear Sir or Madam or Curtain #3:
Firstly, I would like to state that it is with great respect that I address your tribe. The genius of creating a sitcom about the Geico caveman cannot be overstated.
That said, I would like to address the most egregious result of this WGA quagmire… the delayed appearance of Ms. Cherry Jones in the role of Madam President on “24”.
Specifically, my tribe has four main grievances in regard to this particular situation:
1) Deprivation of witnessing Ms. Jones get torqued up at the Secretary of Defense and voice her displeasure in that slinky panther-like growl of hers that is not unlike a jar of molasses being massaged onto a naked body. Where was I?
2) Deprivation of witnessing Ms. Jones in finely-tailored shirts and suits (and perhaps no-nonsense camisoles, if God is good to us) that accentuate her aesthetically-pleasing physique.
3) Deprivation of witnessing Ms. Jones crossing the Potomac in a rowboat, clad in cargo shorts and tank top… is it just me or is the room spinning? Paging Doc Johnson! Paging Doc Johnson!
4) Deprivation of witnessing close-ups of Ms. Jones’ hands as she signs executive orders and the like. This is perhaps the most detrimental facet to my tribe, for reasons known to all of us.
In short, to prevent rioting in the streets and dirigibles falling from the sky (oh, the humanity), just give them their four cents!
Just my two cents, (see? we’re halfway there)
Beastie
